[Blondie]

First, let's get something straight. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to date younger women.

In fact, it's very common. And why not? Women date younger and older men all the time. (That is, unless the woman is not old enough to date you. In that case, you should leave her alone or risk legal sanctions, and no one is worth that!)

Women are actually very attracted to older men, usually because they perceive them to be more stable, put-together, and wise in the ways of the world and love. In fact, many studies suggest that the average woman matures faster than the average man, so why wouldn't a woman want to date an older man?

For some reason, there seems to be a "taboo" in society, at least a mild one, about men dating women who are much younger than them. And there is a very open taboo about women dating younger men! Just look at the reaction to the liaison between Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher.

Yet there are plenty of advantages to dating younger women. Younger women infuse a relationship with energy and a fresh outlook on life. Let's face it: as you get older, you need a little pep and zest in your life to keep you going. You don't want to be one of those guys who are attached to the TV all day because they have no life. A younger woman will infuse you with a zest for life that is healthy and will keep you active later in life.

Long-term relationships are possible, even despite a huge age difference. So, considering this, what should you look for in a younger woman?

First, you should look for a woman with whom you share some common interests. Sometimes the generational differences can be too great. Maybe you came of age in the sixties, she came of age in the eighties, and neither of you can get into one another's music. Maybe she's addicted to text messaging while you're still old-fashioned enough to want to use the phone. You have to consider whether or not there's the potential there for a long-term relationship, if that's what you want.

On the other hand, many young women are open-minded and will be excited to learn what you can offer with your greater experience and knowledge of events that happened before she was born. Make sure that you demonstrate an equal interest in the things she knows about (like technology, pop culture, etc). When you can both share your interests and learn from one another, then chances are good that you'll keep growing together.

Second, you should make sure that she isn't just looking for a father figure. This is a biggie. Some younger women have bad relationships with their fathers and are looking for an older man to be like a father to them. They may ask you for money, expect you to pay every time, and are simply looking for someone to protect them. These women aren't looking for an equal partner; they are looking for someone to replace the gap left in their lives by their father.

This is not the kind of relationship you should want. Frankly, if all they want is your money and material security, then you can do better.

Instead you should look for women who are looking for an older man romantically. A woman should love you for who you are, not what you can give them.

Third, you need to make sure that she is open to dating an older man and aware of the many challenges that the two of you may face. Although dating a younger woman can be done, it isn't always the easiest thing in the world. People may talk about you and your relationship. Her parents, friends, or siblings might disapprove. She may find it difficult to hang out with your older friends, while you may find her younger friends to be too vacuous or think, "Been there, done that." You may find that you're both in different stages of life and that your goals are too different to make a long-term union possible. You need to stay open and communicate about the challenges in your relationship. If the age difference ends up embarrassing her (or embarrassing you), then end it and move on. You should both admire and respect one another.

That said, how do you go about dating a young woman once she meets the above qualifications?

First and foremost, you have to act natural. Don't get caught up in numbers or the fact that you are 5, 10 or even 20 years older than your partner. If you are attracted to someone, you should go for it (as long as she's over legal age). Don't feel awkward and embarrassed around her younger friends, or when she talks about things that you're unfamiliar with because of your generational differences.

Accept that you have a different role to play, and don't feel pressured to act "younger." Just because you are dating a younger woman doesn't mean you should start changing the way you dress, eat or play or what movies you watch. Any sudden change and everybody is going to notice. The change will make it obvious that you are self-conscious about the age gap between you and your partner and are trying too hard to minimize it.

Now, during the course of a relationship with a younger woman, some of these things may change. You might want to change the types of shirts you wear, or the type of glasses you wear. Just don't make all the changes too dramatic and make sure they fit your character rather than the person you are with. You want to make sure that you remain the person she fell for. She found you attractive the way you were when she met you, so don't feel as if you have to change who you are.

Next, you should always consider a little teasing and a lot of flirting. Young women love to flirt, and they love to be teased. Go ahead and tell her you're over the hill, or how immature she is. Make light of the situation. Keep things light and funny. Diffuse any awkwardness with laughter.

Lastly, you should always keep the lines of communication open. The age difference can sometimes includes differences in perception about role expectations and attitudes to certain issues. There may be an expectation for you to take the lead. Many younger women are looking for direction. No matter what, you should discuss your expectations with her: she may want to have a child, and you may feel as if you're past the age that you want to be a father. Talk as much as possible so that neither of you misunderstand or have to guess what the other means.

My last point is that you should remember to take things slowly. She may wonder what your real intentions are, since many older men are after the status and image of having a younger woman on their arm. By taking it slowly, you reassure her that you really want to get to know HER. When you ease into a relationship with a younger woman, the people around you will realize that you are in the relationship because you've already found out how compatible you are and how much you enjoy one another's company. No one will be able to claim that you just jumped into things without thinking.

[OSUCOWBOYS]

Here is the real way to date a younger woman:

[Hercules]

COW-POKE, you forgot to say,
" lick the $100 and stick it on your forehead !!!
No problem then !!! LOL !!!

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by OSUCOWBOYS

Here is the real way to date a younger woman:

Might work with some but not all

[winkyduck]

Originally Posted by Blondie

Might work with some but not all

that all depends

if the younger woman is overweight and ugly any guy with a pulse she will fall for

if she is HOT - the guy better made Brad Pitt look ugly if he wants a chance. if that isn't the case women LOOOOOOOVE money and power - more of the former. the guy better have a bigger and harder bulge in the back of his pants than the front. need proof - think donald trump. you think his wife is with him because he is hot and she loves him? oh, puh-lease. think Hugh Hefner whose 3 "girlfriends" are barely older than him if you combine their ages

blondie - you have 4 kids and thus what you look for in a guy is different than someone like Scarlett Johansson or a Playboy Playmate

[Blondie]

Winky,
Even before I had kids it was different. The money and power are not things that bring happiness. Being with someone with a great personality does and that you care about does.

[winkyduck]

Originally Posted by Blondie

Winky,
Even before I had kids it was different. The money and power are not things that bring happiness. Being with someone with a great personality does and that you care about does.

blondie - i luv ya to death and you know it. but living in middle america things are diff than NYC or LA or otherplaces like that. for HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT babes whose looks make men crash cars or do stupid things - money and power will cure a lot of problems if you are not some hunk

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by winkyduck

blondie - i luv ya to death and you know it. but living in middle america things are diff than NYC or LA or otherplaces like that. for HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT babes whose looks make men crash cars or do stupid things - money and power will cure a lot of problems if you are not some hunk

Back at ya and you know that as well.

But will it guarantee true happiness? NOOOO
It might guarantee a superficial happiness and the ability to "appear" happy, but deep down is that person truly happy? Having what someone else considers the "perfect" life does not guarantee happiness, especially if that life is nothing more than a lie kept up for appearances.

Now it might make it easier to "get in the door" so to speak of a relationship, but it does not guarantee happiness within...

[Artful Dodger]

Young skirt is good

[winkyduck]

Originally Posted by Blondie

Back at ya and you know that as well.

But will it guarantee true happiness? NOOOO
It might guarantee a superficial happiness and the ability to "appear" happy, but deep down is that person truly happy? Having what someone else considers the "perfect" life does not guarantee happiness, especially if that life is nothing more than a lie kept up for appearances.

Now it might make it easier to "get in the door" so to speak of a relationship, but it does not guarantee happiness within...

right - but if a guy is in his 50s and she is in her mid 20s - he doesn't care if she can talk or has a brain. all he cares about is that she is hot - looks great and can wear sexy clothing to make him look good and whenever he wants sex she obliges to it. she uses him to make a better life and get things she might not be able to get on her own and he uses her for a sperm depository. as long as he has money and as long as she had blinding looks that is all either cares about

[4625]

The first error is to intentionally target much younger women. They can sense it, and it makes you seem like a perv. I'm in my 40's, and my last two serious relationships, and currently, were with women in their early 20's, but I wasn't looking for any particular age, it just happened. I will say that taking care of your appearance is a definite must; if you are a clock-stopping slug, she's probably playing you and thinking about someone else while you're in the sack. . .

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by winkyduck

right - but if a guy is in his 50s and she is in her mid 20s - he doesn't care if she can talk or has a brain. all he cares about is that she is hot - looks great and can wear sexy clothing to make him look good and whenever he wants sex she obliges to it. she uses him to make a better life and get things she might not be able to get on her own and he uses her for a sperm depository. as long as he has money and as long as she had blinding looks that is all either cares about

Winky,

Once again think you are a great person, but you are stereotyping. You are taking a percentage of women that have that mind set and applying it to every woman in the world. Not all women are like that and neither are all men.

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by 4625

The first error is to intentionally target much younger women. They can sense it, and it makes you seem like a perv. I'm in my 40's, and my last two serious relationships, and currently, were with women in their early 20's, but I wasn't looking for any particular age, it just happened. I will say that taking care of your appearance is a definite must; if you are a clock-stopping slug, she's probably playing you and thinking about someone else while you're in the sack. . .

4625 It is geat to see you over here in this section of the forum! I always enjoy your insight into issues!

You make a good point, sometimes things like this just happen, and might not even be what you intended to happen. Personally, I am a believer that you find the right person when you stop looking. What do you think about that?

[Jimmy Hoffa]

I'm all for dating younger women. It's a very good thing.

[RealSlimShady]

OSU...this may get you even better looking younger women:

http://aes.iupui.edu/rwise/banknotes...omo-1998_f.jpg

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by Jimmy Hoffa

I'm all for dating younger women. It's a very good thing.

So Mr. Hoffa what would be some of the advantages and disadvantages in your opinion of dating a younger woman?

[winkyduck]

Originally Posted by Blondie

So Mr. Hoffa what would be some of the advantages and disadvantages in your opinion of dating a younger woman?

thankfully i am not Hoffa but i can chime in here

Dis: hard to communicate. with someone close to your own age you can talk about things that happened you both might have experienced since you are close to the same age. for instance you both might have been old enough to recall the BiCentennial celebration of 1976 but not if you are 45 and she is 25 since she wasn't born then

Adv: because she is younger - odds are she has a smoking hot body and can wear some super sexy clothing and when you go out for the night have everyone staring at her

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by winkyduck

thankfully i am not Hoffa but i can chime in here

Dis: hard to communicate. with someone close to your own age you can talk about things that happened you both might have experienced since you are close to the same age. for instance you both might have been old enough to recall the BiCentennial celebration of 1976 but not if you are 45 and she is 25 since she wasn't born then

Adv: because she is younger - odds are she has a smoking hot body and can wear some super sexy clothing and when you go out for the night have everyone staring at her

Winky, once again I think it would depend upon the person. Granted she might not have been there, but who says she would not be interesting in listening to him talk about it?

What about the fact that she might know things that seem foreign to you, couldn't you learn from her?

The superficial attitude that she would only bing something sexy to look at is very small minded Winky and I know you are better than this

[OSUCOWBOYS]

Originally Posted by RealSlimShady

OSU...this may get you even better looking younger women:

http://aes.iupui.edu/rwise/banknotes...omo-1998_f.jpg

It is sad but that is soon to be the "world's currency". Oh have the mighty have fallen.

[4625]

Winky's onto something. There is a disadvantage which can also be an advantage; the frame of reference is different. For example: a person in their twenties probably doesn't think Caddyshack is very funny, while I think it's a top ten movie of all time. The flip side of that example is that when you introduce someone to Led Zeppelin who's never experienced (or even heard of them) and see their eyes light up, it's pretty cool (kewl?).
From the other direction, I've had more than enough of " Rock of Love" and "The Girls Next Door" though I try to stay off my soapbox about how mindnumbingly crappy shows like that are. . .
However, in the long run, I think these differences are relatively minor.

[Rxx]

For another 0.02 opinion on the matter.....

the segment of women looking for a very wealthy older man is very small. While i am by no means very wealthy, i have a quite a comfortable life and certainly do not have wants for material things. I have run into only one younger gal who wanted me for my money and it became a repulsive situation for me which i cut off very quickly.

What i do find is that women today are more concerned with how you look and take care of yourself. They have, generally speaking now, worked hard to become self-sufficient and do not need someone to take care of them. They want someone they find attractive and can share their interests. I think that they are now tending to be more like men in that they make very quick judgements about "chemistry" based upon looks.

just my experience.

[Artful Dodger]

Sometimes, women under 23 can be very stupid. that may be a positive, however.

[Deuce]

I'd rather date an older broad.

[Blondie]

Originally Posted by Rxx

For another 0.02 opinion on the matter.....

the segment of women looking for a very wealthy older man is very small. While i am by no means very wealthy, i have a quite a comfortable life and certainly do not have wants for material things. I have run into only one younger gal who wanted me for my money and it became a repulsive situation for me which i cut off very quickly.

What i do find is that women today are more concerned with how you look and take care of yourself. They have, generally speaking now, worked hard to become self-sufficient and do not need someone to take care of them. They want someone they find attractive and can share their interests. I think that they are now tending to be more like men in that they make very quick judgments about "chemistry" based upon looks.

just my experience.

Very good point. A man can have more money than he knows what to do with, but if he is a real dog or has the personality of a snail the majority of women will not even consider him