Opinions please

Seymour

Seymour

EOG Dedicated
I get an RX that is expensive and my insurance does not cover it - it costs $350 - my brother in law who is one of my best friends works for a huge company and has an insane insurance policy - the same drug costs him $35 - so my father (who is a doc) just calls it into him or my sister and they mail it to me - now, I don't need the RX to live - it's elective - every time getting them to pick up the RX and mail it to me it's a problem - it takes them weeks if not a month to do it - now, when they were building an addition to their home I lent to them 150k and told them to pay me back over 10 years - well, today I really wanted the RX and it's been sitting in their house for like 2 weeks and they still have not sent it - so I go to Walgreens and pick it up myself - I then scan the receipt for $350 and tell them I wish I could go back in time and that if they asked me for the 150k again I would tell them to fuck off - my comment has created a war between us - now, they've never missed a payment over several years and my sister and I are extremely tight - I should not have brought up the money but I was just so pissed off all day after paying $350 for something that could have cost $35 - am I wrong? - my sister says I threw the loan in their face - reality is the loan means nothing to me because they were a lock to pay it and it's my sister and I am the godfather of their first born - I want to diffuse the situation
 
The Prophet

The Prophet

EOG Dedicated
Re: Opinions please

Have them refinance the loan with an institution of lending and kick the expensive drug habit. :thumbsup

FWIW: Cuba deals drugs at a fraction to that of the American market.
 
Seymour

Seymour

EOG Dedicated
Re: Opinions please

It's not a recreational drug - and it has nothing to do with the loan - I'm only pissed because I had to pay $350 because they are so fucking negligent
 
Seymour

Seymour

EOG Dedicated
Re: Opinions please

I'm an attorney but I don't practice - I buy distressed properties - fucked up titles, tax deeds, foreclosures, etc.
 
A

AcesFull

2
Re: Opinions please

It is tough to resort to borrowing money from a family member, and you always feel as if it is hanging over your head. To bring that up was wrong IMO, especially if they always make their payments and the loan is never an issue.

You have good reason to get pissed about the medicine, but one has nothing to do with the other. You lashed out with a comment intentionally made to piss them off.

Besides, they are doing YOU the favor with the medicine to the tune of $315 each month.

Any time you make comments intended to hurt someone solely for the reason of doing so, it isn't going to go down smooth. I think you ought to explain that you were just very upset about having to spend the extra money when you needed the drugs. The comment was uncalled for and you appreciate how well they have been taking care of the loan month after month.

Then explain that you really need better responsiveness with the medicine. If they can't do it regularly, you need to know so you can make other arrangements.

Eat crow. You made the comment. They are partially to blame, but if you value the relationship, you'll talk to them about it.
 
The Prophet

The Prophet

EOG Dedicated
Re: Opinions please

The only reason you’re pissed is because you have placed expectations i.e. family responsibilities, paying a lower cost upon yourself, perhaps the expectations are unreasonable, perhaps you have an inability to effectively communicate your expectations with your family members, perhaps you should be pissed at yourself for having expectations to begin with…take away the expectations and the reasons for your anger vanish. 12io4j2w90


.
 
munson15

munson15

I want winners...
Re: Opinions please

AcesFull said:
It is tough to resort to borrowing money from a family member, and you always feel as if it is hanging over your head. To bring that up was wrong IMO, especially if they always make their payments and the loan is never an issue.

You have good reason to get pissed about the medicine, but one has nothing to do with the other. You lashed out with a comment intentionally made to piss them off.

Besides, they are doing YOU the favor with the medicine to the tune of $315 each month.

Any time you make comments intended to hurt someone solely for the reason of doing so, it isn't going to go down smooth. I think you ought to explain that you were just very upset about having to spend the extra money when you needed the drugs. The comment was uncalled for and you appreciate how well they have been taking care of the loan month after month.

Then explain that you really need better responsiveness with the medicine. If they can't do it regularly, you need to know so you can make other arrangements.

Eat crow. You made the comment. They are partially to blame, but if you value the relationship, you'll talk to them about it.
Click to expand...
I agree with everything except the statement about needing better response time with the meds. Sey can't un-ring that bell, so I think they will be likely to take care of the meds quicker after a straight apology, not an apology followed by a reminder that they have to do better with the delivery. Just my .02.
 
J

joeybagadonuts

Guest
Re: Opinions please

I don't think either person is "right" or "wrong", fighting among family is always bad. Family and not also never mix well, from my (horrible) experiences, Seymour.

The worst of the worst-

I loaned my GF's brother about $20k 2 years ago. We had all sorts of problems with payments. He disappeared to Oregon for 6 months w/o a phone call which caused all sorts of issues for my GF and her family b/c I was suffering b/c of him. He finally retuned back and made a token payment of $500. He said he would make one for $500 every month thereafter, never happened. Always an excuse, my gf would cry, we'd fight, she'd call her mom, mom would call brother, etc, etc. All in all, a huge clusterfuck.

Anyways, I found this service called Virgin Loan. It allows "handshake" promissory notes for loans to friends and family. This way I never have to worry, nor bring it up. It's a legally binding contract, and I put in options to have the interest rate rise with missed/late payments, that automatically get charged to him through the service. The money is transfered from him to me on the first of the month. Best thing I ever did. No more worries or headaches and he is held accountable, in the case of default. It really simplifies things. I would high recommend it if you feel comfortable asking your sister to agree to it.
:cheers
 
Flamingo kid

Flamingo kid

Everybody's hands go UP!
Re: Opinions please

Just remember one thing about loans. The person who's asking for money is asking because they dont have any.
 
T

Thor4140

EOG Dedicated
Re: Opinions please

i only lend money to people i never want to talk to again. Its nice to have that type of person dodging ya for what i hope isn't that big of a loan.
 
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